I’ve had this image in my head for almost as long as I’ve had the guts to say I’m going to do a marathon next fall. Picture it, I’ve just crossed the finish line after running 26.2 miles (or 26.84 according to my Garmin – because my watch always tells me I ran more than the mile markers seem to indicate.) Shockingly, I am not a sweaty beast of drooling, snotty goodness. My hair, instead of dripping with sweat is flowing in a gentle breeze. I’m smiling and jazz handsing instead of lumbering in a disoriented zombie-like daze. As I float across the finish, I’m embraced by my perfect boyfriend who has been waiting for me so he can make sure everyone knows that he’s so proud of his girl. (Still casting for the role of “perfect boyfriend.” I can’t seem to get beyond 2 dates.)
Except there’s a twist before that embrace. In my moment of triumph I will suddenly become a good dancer and acrobat. While floating across the finish, I will nod as Baby did. And Perfect Boyfriend (who won’t look anything like Patrick Swayze because I’m really more of a Matt Damon or John Krasinski girl) will swagger back directly in my path (other runners? pffft!) and I will run and leap and we will complete a perfect lift ala Dirty Dancing.
It will look EXACTLY like that.
And someone will take a picture and we will be famous. (and I will qualify for Boston on my first try! because this is a dream and I can do anything!)
Here’s the thing: I’ve been feeling burnt out and discouraged with running. At the same time, I’m still invigorated and making goals. I’m getting better and I’m pushing myself in spite of my desire to just not run sometimes.
Part of this is related to the fact that I am running my second half marathon in less than 2 weeks. When I did the first one I didn’t have anything to lose. I was out there to prove I could do it. I was out there to show that I was not a quitter (I had a sinus infection and I was on my period – TMI? I DON’T CARE.) Now I have a time to beat and I have a goal time. This is the half marathon that was the whole point of my training calendar. I HAVE to do well.
Perhaps I should add dancing to my cross training regimine so I’ll be ready for the Time of My Life — because I’m going to do it. I’m going to keep running. Keep improving. Keep moving. Keep dreaming and daydreaming.