Same Horse, New Shoes

To use a cliche to gentley ease into this post, I need to get back on the horse. You see, I haven’t really worked out since last Thursday. (I walked on the treadmill on Friday, but I’m not counting that.) For once in my life, I have a good reason. The day of my last post, January 13th, my mom passed away.  She was 56.

In her last years, my mom struggled with diabetes and obesity. However, in the 25 years prior (of the 30 in which I was blessed to have her alive) she was very health conscious. She ate vegetables. She drank water. She exercised. However, she also smoked.

I’m sure the stroke that killed her was caused by some combination of long-time smoking (though she’d recently quit), a multitude of prescription medications for various ailments (any more on this will only be a rant about what is wrong with health care in America), lack of movement, and a profound sadness.

For me, I know activity is the best medication. And I think it could have saved my mother. I too struggle with depression and social anxiety. But getting out, being with people. moving my body, eating healthy food, and creating new experiences and memories is my salvation. New experiences make my brain sing and gives me things to write about. Writing fuels my self esteem and provides an outlet for emotional satisfaction. Exercise provides immediate lift through all the fun sciencey biology things someone else can explain to you.

My mom also read and commented on this blog. She loved me. She felt my pain. She felt my elation. And she knew my struggle. It was with great conviction that she told me she knew I would achieve my goals. And so Mom, I do this for both of us. I get back on the horse. I put down the Russell Stover’s and the comfort foods.

I fill my body with wholesome foods. With power I push myself – further than I think I can – as far as I can go.

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