I did not go to the gym today. I was STARVING (American style) on my way home from work, so I debated a salad vs. Subway (aka tortuously waffled as I sat in the storm induced highway standstill) and ended up at Subway. I decided today would be a rest day. Yesterday I put in a good showing at the gym with my 50 minutes of treadmill time and my quad machine and inclined leg press madness. I discovered that 8pm on Monday is “guy time” at my gym, where all the men show up, mill about, occasionally grunt, dramatically drop weights, drink from gallon jugs of water, and sometimes lift a weight or two. I judge not. They have their purpose and goals and I have mine.
I am worried that I’m becoming obsessed with food and exercise. I have addictive and obsessive tendencies so I have to figure out how to relax, enjoy life, and still ensure I am achieving my goals. I felt pretty crappy after eating well, exercising and then posting a weight gain this morning.
I have to hope it’s poop, water, or muscle. But I fear it’s just fat and that despite all the effort, I’m failing and I have to cut back my diet more (not sure that’s possible as I’m working at skimming the minimum 1200) or need to exercise more. Who has time (and clean clothes) for that? Not to mention the pluck.
Or perhaps I’m being too restrictive? Even as I sit here and write this, I feel hungry. And that’s not healthy either.